Before I knew who my biological father was he abandoned my mother and I. She married my step father in her late teens or early 20's. When I was 6 years old she committed suicide and I was the first to see her body which left an indelible mark on my life. She was only 23 years old, which really broke my heart when I found out. About a year or so after she passed my step father began abusing me mentally, physically and emotionally. Meanwhile my next door neighbor who was a 16 year old boy and my babysitter who was a 14 year old girl were sexually abusing me.
When I was 9 years old my step father beat me so bad I had bruises and various cuts and wounds all over my face and body. My fourth grade teacher noticed immediately. She took me to the principles office and they called Child Protective Services. They came to the school and interviewed me, then took me home, told my step father he's under investigation and left me there. About 2 weeks later after I stayed on the phone too long with a little girl I met on the bus, my step father choked me and threw me down the narrow hallway of our trailer and beat me. I decided that night (at 9 years old) I was going to run away. He saw the clothes I packed in my pillowcases and he began beating me again. The next day he took me to the local foster care agency and told the receptionist that "I'm their problem now" and left me.
To make a very long story short, in foster care I was abused in every way you can think of. I bounced around 30 plus foster homes, group homes, boy's ranches, mental institutions, runaway shelters and where ever else they could place me. When I turned 18 I was kicked out of my last foster home and left homeless. Which began a very long life of drug and alcohol addiction, promiscuity, sexual deviances, chronic homelessness and the list goes on.
At 19 years old I was in a homeless shelter and I gave my life to Jesus. Needless to say I came to Christ with a lot of baggage so I really didn't "look" or "act" like someone who decided to accept Him as their Lord and Savior. God definitely had a hold of me, but it was impossible to tell from the naked eye. I had beautiful and wonderful experiences with Him, but they were seemingly short lived.
Which brings me to 2001, 2002. I miraculously ended up at a Bible college in central Florida. The intimate experiences I had with the Lord while I was at the school were undeniable and life changing. I still had significant baggage so there were a lot of ups and downs. Many times the downs were longer than I would have liked.
In 2007 I was truly starting to understand Gods love for me. I started healing in ways I couldn't begin to comprehend. In coming to terms with His love, I received a vision for Seeking God's Heart Ministries Children and Families (SGHMCF), to help youth, young adults and their families to overcome and heal from their painful pasts, and to help them understand the love God has for them.
Although I still had significant struggles with sins and pain in my life, and a lot to learn, I began educating myself by volunteering and working at various non profits, ministries, and agencies that specialize in working with youth, young adults and at times adults. Although the education and experience I received from these places is invaluable, I wanted to get some kind of formal education, so I decided to go back to Bible college and a school that exclusively teaches how to work with children and how to teach them the love of Christ. I also began taking courses online to understand the effects of childhood trauma and abuse and how it plays out into adulthood if left unchecked.
Through the years I've implemented SGHMCF in a number of places. I first moved to the Capital District of New York in 2017 to work at a ministry/church here. While my intention was to help my friend with his church I still had to work through some issues I had about my identity in Christ. I found myself at a ministry in Albany New York called the Capital City Rescue Mission. In their Discipleship program is where God really solidified His call on my life and removed any struggle I had to believe it.
In 2018 I decided to take a pause on SGHMCF to help another international children's ministry, so I became their local director. God did amazing things through me and my team in the ministry. Numerous children were affected by the Gospel and a good amount confessed Jesus as their Lord and Savior. However In 2020 Covid brought everything to a screeching halt. As we tried to get everything moving again God was putting SGHMCF back on my heart. At some point I knew I needed to move on.
After being in the Capital District and working with the youth, young adults and their families I fell in love with the area. I realized we have a lot of folks here that could use some help, so me and my team decided to launch SGHMCF in the Capital District of New York. Although our main home is in New York, we also have locations where we minister in the Tampa Bay area, West Virginia and South Carolina.
We are really excited about where God will take the ministry as we continue to seek His heart.
